No Soliciting!

Every night before I fall asleep I carefully check that every door of our house is locked, and then I tuck my floral comforter tightly around my neck.  I joke with Jared that any limbs I may leave hanging out of the covers will be in danger when the "burglars" get in.  But in all seriousness, I am terrified of burglars.  Maybe I watch too much Law and Order: SVU, but home invasion tops my list of fears.  Knowing this, you will understand my hesitation to open my front door to any unexpected visitors (even the UPS guy). 

[This is where I would insert a painfully long story about what I thought was a burglar breaking into our backyard in the middle of the afternoon, only to discover a Santa lookalike from the home insurance company measuring our lot...]  The fact is, if I had opened the door when he rang the bell, I would have known what he was up to in the first place. I needed to be able to weed out the potential time-wasters and creepy magazine salespeople so that I would feel comfortable answering the door for the people who are knocking for legitimate reasons. And so, I succumbed to my Pat-Bashford-like sensibilities and scribbled a temporary "No Soliciting" sign.

Now I am replacing my little piece of scrapbook paper with a more permanent solution. The little plastic signs available for purchase remind me of bathroom placards and just really aren't my style.  Here is my homemade version:

I found a small unfinished wooden tray at Hobby Lobby that looked like the perfect size.  After painting the whole thing black, I carved my letters out with an exacto knife.  In order to protect my paint job from the elements, I sprayed the whole thing with a finishing gloss.  It's like a "take that!" to solicitors (in a polite way, of course. You know me).

Here it is hanging in position.